Police and medical workers have confirmed that last night, Sarah Jean Orcutt slammed her thumb in the door of a car last night at approximatly 11:55pm. After severe bleeding, taco bell and bandage, no follow up medical work was required. Authorities have said that no charges have been filed against the owner of the car, as Sarah is pregnant and therefore a little absent minded at times. She may lose up to half of her fingernail due to gross liquids and colors.
In other news, the 28th of this month Sarah will be celebrating her one year anniversary with her boyfriend and father of her child, Michael Whipple. No attempts to reach her family for comments have been succesful, but his family and friends have been heard to say, "One year already? Has it been that long?" Yes, it has.
Jim and Patty's have given Michael a raise at work. This coencides with the hiring of three new employees, which may significantly reduce his tip income, so the raise comes at a fortuidous time.
This just in; Michael is 12 minutes late from his lunch break, and he has yet to call Sarah. No word of consequences has reached us. More on this later.
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